Well if you didn't already know...I'm terribly anxious AND I feel like I'm losing my mind. I do, however have good news to share. My last set of x-rays showed that my bones are healing very well & I will be ready to have this fixator off a month from now. Woohoo! Well, technically a month from the 25th of May BUT Dr. Paley is booked up a lot this summer. I had to settle for July 7th, which isn't too bad. What's bad is I know I'm having surgery in one month & it is making this month draaagggg on & onnn. I'm losing it. It's just not moving fast enough. I want my life back now please. NOW.
We'll be driving the 6hrs to Augusta, Ga where Ryan is & then from there driving 9 more hrs to WPB, Fl. This will be the first time I get to see "our house" I will be living in when we're married. He has a roommate right now...who I have to say I am quite jealous of. I understand that they're splitting the rent right now & that the house is equally theirs but I feel like I am supposed to be the one there. I mean, Ryan picked out the house based on both of our preferences of what we want to live in as a married couple...now there is this guy staying there...his girlfriend visiting...& I haven't even stepped foot in the house I will be living in. I'm JEALOUS. It just kind of makes my heart ache. Knowing that they are there when I SHOULD be, getting to know our dog better than she's gotten to know me & I can't do anything about it because the reality is I am stuck in this fixator. I can't change that. Also, as a woman it disturbs me to know that another woman is arranging my kitchen. Grr. Ha, just had to vent a little.
I'm so happy I have the opportunity to change my life & have these surgeries...but I absolutely hate how it puts my life on hold. I've spent the last 8 months waaaiiiting in pain. I'm physically & emotionally drained. Every emotion I have now is magnified. Sick.of.it. Ok I'm getting off my soap box. Next post will be happier, promise.
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